Emotional Turmoil in School, my room, Everywhere

Recently, I have been under a lot of stress. I have been experiencing a panic attack a day practically, and I have been depressed. I have had a lot of anxiety and I have been feeling lonely. All of these things have been feeding on each other and it is hard for me to even want to go to class as a result.

The thing that I have done this week to overcome all of this is a technique that I was taught recently that really works.

The technique is as follows. I was told that physical symptoms from panic attacks last around 90 seconds. That is the essence of the technique. Get past that 90 second mark. I am happy to say this one works for me, but I caution the reliance on it. It is very tiring. What I do is I focus on my breathing. I focus on where the air is in my body. It is a technique ingrained  in mindfulness. That is why the technique works so well for me. I am, as a result of living with panic for 10 years, a master at recognizing my own symptoms.

Panic attacks have these symptoms for me:

  • Shortness of breath
  • Chest Tightens
  • Extreme fear
  • Sweating
  • Racing Thoughts
  • Sensory Intake increase

When I feel these things happening, I know a panic attack is not far behind. The thing that bothers me about my panic attacks nowadays is that they have adapted to happen at inopportune times, like I stated above. Usually right before any of my classes, but especially math and Typography. I get absolutely terrified that something completely illogical is going to happen. One time, just to illustrate the point, I thought the world was going to end. (Political climate notwithstanding) Another time, I was convinced that asteroids were on their way to surgically strike the planet to herald an alien invasion. Just to name a few of the completely illogical and unwarranted fears that I have when I have panic attacks. I know that they are not going to happen. It is far more likely that I am just having a panic attack and I am overreacting to my racing thoughts.

That is something else I want to cover in this post. I want feedback on this as well. I have panic attacks daily and I have grown so used to to them that I think I take them for granted and I dismiss the severity of having a panic disorder. Do others experience panic attacks to the rate that I do? I really want to know so we can compare notes and figure out why mine are so frequent. I think I know the answer, and it is in part because I am autistic, part because of my social phobia. It makes logical sense, but there are holes in the theory.

For instance, I have them even when I am not in a large crowd or semi large group of people. I have them when I am alone. I have them randomly and I have them triggered. I am just wondering what others feel and what the rate is.

Thanks so much for reading! Please leave me comments! I want to hear from you guys!

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One Comment Add yours

  1. Eric P. says:

    I deal with panic attacks myself. My symptoms are classic flight or fight; I get irritable, feel pinned in, have nausea, and vision issues. When unmedicated, I go through an average of three or four attacks a day; medicated, they space out to one every week or so.

    My attacks are clearly stress related. A lot of it I got from my mother; she would freak out and go into a frenzy if guests were expected; I struggle with the same. She always felt judged by people irrationally; I’m the same. Other issues are all my own – loud situations, crowds, or ironically extended isolation all will cause attacks. And work, when it’s problematic my desire to succeed always sends me into a panic. I mentally know I do well at my job – I’ve had a good deal of success, am well liked, and have decent tenure. But if any issue arises I feel like it’s fully my issue and that I’m likely to be fired, even when relatively minor.

    Anyway, I hope that helps. You’re not alone at all in dealing with this. For me, part of it is keeping on medication, pushing to create a space for me and my needs, and building in stress relief periodically. It doesn’t go away…but it helps build a space in to adapt and help manage and minimize the effect.

    Like

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